I felt like diverting from our normal look at Romans this week in favor of a subject that came up recently in connection with a couple of people I know. Making decisions.
How do we go about making those decisions in life that scripture is silent on? Should I take this new job? Should I get that degree? Should I date this girl? The Bible doesn't give us personalized answers to these questions and the Christian cliche answer, "pray about it" sounds good (and IS good!), but seems incomplete. Even ripe for abuse.
For example, some folks I've talked to pull out James 1:5 as a proof text for the idea that God will give us personalized feelings, signs or "impressions" that provide any answer we need. But this verse, while promising wisdom, doesn't say anything about when or how that wisdom will be received. So assuming it will come in a certain form or within a certain time, based on that verse alone, is a dangerous way to interpret the Bible.
One friend I talked to last Saturday was in the midst of making a big career path decision. She felt almost completely adrift regarding what she should do with her life. I told her that in my life, I've tried to analyze who I am, what my skills are and what my purpose in life is, and then look for the scenario that bests fits all of that. She then asked, "but isn't there a place for just throwing caution to the wind, diving in and trying something?" I told her that I thought there was, but that there are two extremes I think we can fall into. The first would be to act only on the information you have and can understand. If we did that, we'd never get anything done! The other extreme is to just "trial and error" our way through life, following each impulse of the moment until we get lucky. That results in a lot of harm to self and others that could be avoided if we're willing to pursue truth.
The best route, I think, is to go as far as our reason and wisdom will take us. Then, when we've hit that dead end, ask God to direct us in making the right call. Once we've done those two things, I think we take that leap into the darkness.
There is not much we can contribute to the "leaping" part of the process. What waits in the dark is beyond our control. But is there a way we can develop our sense of reason? Our ability to use wisdom to discern right from wrong?
The Bible says quite a bit about wisdom, and how valuable it is to pursue it. The book of Proverbs is dedicated to developing wisdom in its readers. The Bible itself serves as a "filter" we can pass our thoughts through, to see if they contribute to or detract from the agenda God has for all humans.
It's been quite awhile since I posted this, so I thought I'd share again a topical index I created a few years ago that came out of my personal study of the book of Proverbs. The index below attempts to organize each proverb in an approximate topical group, including topics such as finances, relationships, marriage, leadership, and various sins we all struggle with.
Although I have never heard the audible "voice of God", I can say that he speaks to my individual concerns through his word, by something as simple as "process of elimination". For example, if I'm considering doing "A"(be it a career choice, relationship choice, whatever) , which is not bad in and of itself, but it will have the side effects of "B", which the Bible warns me to avoid, then by being familiar with the Bible's warning against "B" I can make the choice to avoid "A", confident that doing so is God's desire for me.
Likewise, if the Bible encourages "D", and choosing "C" will better enable me to do "D", then again, barring any downsides, I can be confident that God is "calling me"(and often abused phrase in Christian culture) to choose "C".
This is the approach I've tried to take with life decisions, big and small. And I hope the index copied below is a tool you can find useful as you aim to seek the truth.
Resources/ Finances- 3:9-10, 6:1-5, 10:15-16, 22, 11:4, 15-16, 18, 24-26, 28, 12:27, 13:8, 11, 22-23, 14:4, 20-21, 24, 30, 15:6, 15-16, 27, 16:8, 17:8, 16, 18, 18:11, 16, 23, 19:4, 6, 7, 14, 17, 20:16, 21, 21:5, 6, 13, 17, 20, 25, 26, 30, 22:1, 2, 7, 9, 16, 26-27, 23:4-8, 23, 24:27, 27:12, 13, 23-27, 28:6, 8, 11, 15, 20, 22, 25, 27, 29:3, 7, 14, 30:8, 9
Provision- 10:3, 29-30, 11:8, 12:7, 21, 13:21, 25, 14:8, 11, 26-27, 15:3, 25, 29, 16:1, 3, 6, 9, 15, 17, 20, 33, 18:10, 19:12, 21, 23, 20:4, 13, 24, 21:5, 13, 30, 31, 23:17-18, 27:7, 28:6, 25, 26, 30:5
Pride- 3:7, 34, 11:2, 12:9, 13:10, 15:33, 16:5, 18-19, 17:9, 18:1, 12, 20:9, 22, 21:4, 22, 24, 25:3, 6-8, 27, 26:1, 8, 12, 27:1, 2, 21, 28:11, 26, 29:23, 30:12, 13, 30:32
Godliness- 10:6-7, 9, 20, 27, 29-32, 11:4, 5-6, 10-11, 19-21, 28, 30, 12:2, 5, 10, 12, 28, 13:5-6, 9, 21, 25, 14:2, 9, 11, 14, 19, 34, 15:8-9, 26, 33, 16:2, 6, 8, 14, 17, 31, 17:5, 18:3, 19:16, 20:2, 9, 11, 21:3, 4, 8, 10, 21, 22:4, 24:15-16, 24:21-22, 25:26, 28:1, 4, 7, 9, 12, 29:7, 16, 18, 24, 27
Correction-3:11-12, 6:20-23, 9:7-9, 10:8, 10, 17, 11:14, 12:1, 15, 13:1, 10, 13-14, 18, 15:2, 5, 10, 12, 14, 22, 31-32, 16:20-21, 17:10-12, 18:15, 19:3, 20, 25, 27, 20:5, 12, 18, 30, 21:11, 22:17, 18, 23:9, 12, 19, 23, 24: 5-6, 26, 25: 11, 12, 27:5, 6, 9, 17, 28:14, 29:1, 18
Love/Hate- 10:12, 11:17,25, 12:2,10,20, 13:2, 14:17,21-22,35, 15:1, 16:27, 17:5,13, 20:22,28, 21:10,21, 22:16, 24:15-16, 17-18, 25:17,20,21-22, 26:21, 27:3, 28:3, 29:13, 30:14
Serving- 3:27-28, 14:21, 17:17, 18:16, 19:6,17,
Pain- 14:13, 17:22, 18:14
Conflict(resolution)- 10:18, 11:29, 14:9, 15:7, 16:7,14, 17:11, 18:18-19, 20:3,22, 22:10, 24-25, 24:8-9, 25:21-22, 26:4, 5, 17, 20, 21, 29:22
Sacrifice- 14:4, 18:16, 21:3, 25:4
Leadership—14:28, 34-35, 15:22, 16:3, 10,12,13, 14-15, 25, 32, 17:7, 19:10,12, 25, 20:8, 26, 28, 21:1, 22:11, 24:7, 25:2,3, 5, 6-7, 26: 6, 8, 10, 28:2, 12, 15, 16, 21, 28, 29:2, 4, 12, 14, 16, 19, 21, 26, 31:4-5
The Heart- 4:23, 14:10, 12, 15:8, 11, 13, 15, 16:2, 17:3, 20, 22, 18:8, 14, 19:2, 20:9, 27, 21:2, 27, 22:11, 23:19, 26, 24:12, 27:19
Hope/Fear- 10:24-25, 28, 11:7, 23, 31, 12:3, 7, 21, 25, 28, 13:12, 19, 21, 14:11, 14, 26, 27, 30, 32, 15:24-25, 29, 16:4, 9, 17, 33, 17:3, 18:10, 19:21, 23, 20:24, 28, 21:30, 31, 23:17-18, 24:10, 19-20, 28:1, 29:25
Words/Language- 4:24, 10:11, 13-14, 18-21, 31-32, 11:9, 11-13, 22, 12:5-6, 13-14, 16, 18, 23, 25-26, 13:2-3, 17, 14:3, 23, 15:1-2, 4, 7, 23, 26, 28, 16:23-24, 27-28, 17:4, 7, 9, 14, 19, 20, 27, 28, 18:2, 4, 6-7, 8, 13, 20, 21, 19:28, 20:5, 15, 19, 25, 21:19, 23, 28, 22:11, 14, 17-18, 24:1-2, 9, 25:8-10, 11, 15, 20, 23, 25, 26:6, 7, 9, 18-19, 20, 22, 23, 24-26, 28, 27:14, 28:23, 29:5, 20, 30:6
Integrity/Honesty- 11:1, 3, 5, 12:17, 19-20, 22, 13:5, 7, 17, 14:5, 25, 15:4, 27, 16:11, 13, 29-30, 17:4, 7, 8, 15, 23, 18:17, 19:1, 5, 9, 22, 28, 20:6, 7, 9, 10, 14, 19, 23, 25, 21:6, 14, 28, 22:5, 12, 28, 23:10-11, 24:28-29, 25:14, 18, 19, 26:18-19,23-26, 28, 27:6, 19, 28:6, 10, 13, 16, 18, 20, 21, 23, 29:5, 10, 12, 24, 30:6, 8, 10
Relationships/Marriage- 5:3-6, 7-14, 15-17, 18-23, 6:24-29, 30-35, 7:4-5, 6-27, 12:4, 13:20, 14:1, 7, 22, 15:17, 30, 16:7, 28, 17:1, 17, 19, 18:19, 22, 24, 19:13, 14, 19, 22, 20:6, 21:9, 10, 19, 22:14, 23:27-28, 25:17, 20, 24, 27:10, 14, 15-16, 17, 28:7, 29:3, 30:19, 20, 31:2-3, 10-31
Judging- 11:27, 13:23, 16:10, 17:9, 18:13, 17, 19:11, 20, 8, 24:23-25
Family/Parenting- 13:24, 14:1, 15:20,30, 17:6,17,21,25, 19:13,18,19,25,26, 20:7,20,29, 21:18, 22:6, 15, 23:13-14, 22, 24-25, 26:3, 27:8, 11, 28:24, 29:3,15,17,21, 30:11,17, 31:10-31
Work- 6:6-11, 10:4-5, 26, 12:11, 14, 24, 27, 13:4,11, 14:4, 15-16, 23-24, 15:19, 16:3, 26, 18:9, 19:15, 24, 20:4, 13, 21, 21:5, 17, 25, 26, 22:13, 29, 23:20-21, 24:27, 30-34, 25:13, 26:13-16, 27:18, 28:19
Justice- 11:31, 12:5, 21, 13:6, 14:14, 32, 15:3, 25, 16:5, 12, 17:5, 11, 15, 23, 26, 18:5, 17, 19:5, 9, 28, 29, 20:2, 22, 26, 30, 21:7,11,12,15,18, 22:8, 22-23, 24:11, 17-18, 19-20, 23-25, 28-29, 25:5, 21-22, 26:2,27, 28:4,5,12,17,18,28, 29:6,9,14,26, 31:8-9
Wisdom- 9:10-12, 10:1,13-14,20-21,23, 11:9,30, 12:8,23, 13:15-16,20, 14:3,6,8,18,33, 15:14,21, 16:16,21-22, 17:2,7,24, 18:2,15, 19:2,3,8, 20:29, 21:6, 22:12, 23:1-3, 23,26, 24:3-4, 5-6, 13-14, 25:2, 26:12, 27:12, 22, 28:11, 29:3, 30:24-28
Jealousy- 12:12, 14:30, 23:17-18, 24:1-2, 19-20, 27:4
Sin’s Consequences- 9:16-18, 10:2, 20:1, 17, 25, 23:29-35, 24:17-18, 21-22, 26:27, 29:24,
Discipline/Self-control- 16:32, 20:30, 21:18,29, 22:3, 23:23, 25:15, 16,28, 26:3,11, 27:20, 22, 29:19
Anger- 12:16, 14:17, 29, 15:1, 18, 17:14, 19, 27, 18:1,6, 19:3,11,19, 20:3,22, 22:10,24-25, 24:17-18, 26:27, 29:8,11,22, 30:33
Addiction- 20:1, 23:29-35, 31:4-5, 6-7
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