Paul has been talking about some of the various spiritual gifts that Christians are given to serve God and their community of believers. In chapter 12, he emphasized the equality of all believers, regardless of what their gifting may be. In chapter 13, he takes this one step further and points out the complete lack of value in any spiritual gift if its owner does not exercise love.
Love is a very popular word in spiritual discussions today. Though mainstream culture may have issues with Christianity, most non-Christians would still probably say they admire what the Bible says about love.
We often think of love as an emotion. A feeling that we have no control over. Something that just happens. We “fall in love”. (Some would even say they fall OUT of love.) We think of it as an almost mystical force that leads us around by the nose.
The Greek word used for love in this chapter is “agape”. It refers to a benevolent love that acts in someone else’s interest rather than one’s own interests. Someone exercising agape love will prioritize others over themselves. This is the kind of love God demonstrated by sacrificing Jesus so that we could have forgiveness and a relationship with God that lasts forever. It’s a love that doesn’t always involve pleasure for the one exercising it. In fact it often involves some level of discomfort. In some cases it may even involve terrible emotional pain for the one exercising it. It is also the most beautiful and powerful kind of love when put into action, and results in long-term fulfillment.
This is why Paul sees it as more important than even the most effective use of spectacular spiritual gifts. Without agape love, the gift of tongues become obnoxious, vast knowledge and miraculous faith are worthless, radical giving is pointless and even being martyred for Christ gains us nothing. (v. 1-3)
This chapter presents a great opportunity for us to look at the relationships we have in our lives and explore how we can more effectively love those around us. Agape love can be applied to any kind of relationship. Spouse, parent, sibling or friend.
Try to avoid the temptation of reading through verses 4-7 too quickly. You might consider bringing a specific relationship to mind and pausing at each descriptive word in these verses.
(v.4)How can I be more patient with this person? How can I initiate kindness toward them? Am I avoiding thoughts of jealousy regarding something they have or some attribute they possess? Do I spend more time talking about me than them when we’re together? Do I secretly think of myself as more important than them in any way?
(v.5)Do I extend social courtesies to them, or have I become so comfortable with them that I take them for granted? Am I looking for what I can get out of the relationship, or looking for what I can put into it? Do become angered easily by this person or keep a mental list of all the times they’ve hurt or failed me?
(v.6)Do I ever “punish” them with my behavior or take satisfaction from mistreating them? Do I value the truth as I look at this relationship, or do I prefer to believe what I want about it?
(v.7)Am I willing to endure discomfort for the sake of this relationship? Do I think the very best about this person until clear evidence indicates otherwise? Am I always negative or can I bring optimism to this relationship? Am I willing to forgive their flaws?
It should be noted that agape love is not about being walked all over. Sometimes agape love behaves in a way that is in the best interest of others, though they may not see it that way at the time. (Much like Jesus’ contemporaries wanted a warrior, but he came as a suffering servant and sacrifice because that is what we all really needed.)
Agape love doesn’t ignore sin in others, but it does demonstrate patience and forgiveness while confronting and working through sin issues with others.
Although no one will exercise agape love perfectly, we can each repeatedly ask ourselves: “In what area can I grow in agape love today?” “How can I better apply agape love to a relationship this week?”
Next Week- Love’s “Staying Power”
Coffee House Question
What seems to be pop culture’s definition of love and where do we see this definition expressed?
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